Post by Box of Rain on Nov 25, 2007 5:13:39 GMT -5
Your mom was born about 15 years before you were, to an average family that lived in an average neighborhood in an average town or city that followed the laws of averages. Your mom, following this trend, was decidedly interesting and unique. Actually, no, not really, she was average. Her early childhood began, like most, with a period of preschool, followed by kindergarten, which was followed by 1st grade, which was followed by 2nd grade, which was followed by 3rd grade, which was followed by 4th grade, which was followed by 5th grade, which was followed by 5th grade again, your mom not being the brightest individual. This concluded your mom's brief stay in her elementary school, which was unexpectedly average.
Following elementary school was middle school, a time which for your mom begot sexual discovery, further loss of intelligence, and massive weight gain. It was just after her further loss of intelligence, but before the massive weight gain, when your mom discovered that she could get boys to like her, simply by having sex with them. Naturally, she utilized, and often abused this fact, since she really really liked having boys liking her. And then there was the sex, which she also liked. In fact, she really really really liked the sex, the additional really showing that she liked the boys liking her only two thirds as much as she liked the sex. She really liked that sex.
Little did your mom know, colossal amounts of promiscuous, unprotected sex does have consequences. Go figure. Yes, after her sixth, seventh, and eighth grade years in middle school, your mom had already acquired 17 different STDs, including three that were previously unknown to man. It was at the end of her eighth grade year that your mom noticed an alarming lack of menstruation in her usually regular cycles. Yes, it seemed that your mom had finally become your mom.
dat wuz on mione
Following elementary school was middle school, a time which for your mom begot sexual discovery, further loss of intelligence, and massive weight gain. It was just after her further loss of intelligence, but before the massive weight gain, when your mom discovered that she could get boys to like her, simply by having sex with them. Naturally, she utilized, and often abused this fact, since she really really liked having boys liking her. And then there was the sex, which she also liked. In fact, she really really really liked the sex, the additional really showing that she liked the boys liking her only two thirds as much as she liked the sex. She really liked that sex.
Little did your mom know, colossal amounts of promiscuous, unprotected sex does have consequences. Go figure. Yes, after her sixth, seventh, and eighth grade years in middle school, your mom had already acquired 17 different STDs, including three that were previously unknown to man. It was at the end of her eighth grade year that your mom noticed an alarming lack of menstruation in her usually regular cycles. Yes, it seemed that your mom had finally become your mom.
dat wuz on mione